OMG FINALLY (IT'S A NEW YEAR)

Hey there, I am finally updating my blog again (thanks to my extreme boredom), and since I ran out of ideas of what to post, I'm just gonna sum up what year 2013 has been for me.

I spent three agonizing months waiting for my results and in March I got my SPM result (equivalent to high school diploma I guess?) with 4As (which is pretty low in Asian standards). I then procrastinated for months (now to think of it, I actually worked a while) before getting into college. I started my 2 year and 5 months diploma in culinary arts at Sunway University and met some awesome people (thumbs up to you if you guys are reading this). At first I was overpowered by the amount of stuff they are trying to cram into our skulls (cooking at the first day of practical class), but I adjusted myself as time passed. I've made some friends, and rivalries I suppose, over the three months of routine life. Everything was going a-okay until the night before my birthday, when things got serious.

My parents decided to confront me about my sexuality and asked if I'm gay, and took hella lot of time doing just that. I told them yes, and then there's the usual homosexual versus homophobic battle (which took two hours, ridiculous). They proceeded to try to "talk" me out of it, and throwing all manners of homophobic slurs around, such as "gay isn't normal", "gay is a mental illness", "your mind is sick", the standard package and all. After they realised they are not going anywhere with this, they said that I "torment" them, "disappoint" them, and just so you know, I did not hear a single word expressing love for me, whoever I am.

The incident is then gradually "forgotten" (yeah right), and our lives became normal again, or at least as normal as it was before. Laughter and joy came back (provided no one mentions the elephant in the room). I continued to go to my classes and carried on with my daily lives. December came and so did finals. To tell the truth, I did not study for as long as I ought to, only as long as it was necessary to. Still, I got through the tests without crying outside of the examination room, so I guess I did okay.

A week ago, my parents went to China with their passionate local friend (of North Korean descent in case anyone was curious) to look at ice sculptures and buy cheap (and possibly third-rated) stuff. Not having any interest, I stayed at home with my maid (yes, a maid, we still have that in Malaysia, but my parents and I treat her like family). One day I was just staring into nothingness, then out of nowhere I asked myself: what am I doing with my life?

After some thought, I realise, yes I do love food and I do love to cook, even as a job, but I have a bigger dream, a dream to be part of the world's performing arts crew. No I never danced and I only acted once in my life, but then I always felt something was missing from my life, even after studying for culinary arts, something I thought I love the most. Occasionally I will be told off for being "dramatic" and "unnecessarily extrovert", but sometimes people say I seal my lips and not say anything. I gave a lot of thought into this, and now I am still giving thought into it. I hope to come up with a decision before the clock strikes at midnight on the first of January.

Well that was probably the longest post (and the most personal) I have made on my blog. This blog is where I vent and speak out my thought freely, for people normally don't listen to me, with opinions such as "philosopher", "poetic" and "deep". I write this blog because I want to show people I am like everyone else, though I might be more lengthy and fanciful with my speech. Good day to you, peace out.

BLACKOUT MALAYSIA

I can't express the feeling I'm feeling right now. I don't know how to pull it out of my mouth. I simply can't comprehend the fact that this particular event happened. How can boxes of ballot papers appear out of the thin air within the period of a blackout? And what a coincidence those ballot papers are all for the scale? Someone suggested magic, and I'm not denying. After 56 years of trickery and lies, they continued their shameless act. In what part of the world do you hear that the candidate bought votes from foreigners by giving them citizenship and cash? And in what part of the world do you hear that magic ballot paper tricks are performed on a national scale? I simply do not have enough words for such act of utter disgracefulness by not one, but a whole bunch of sore losers. Peace out readers, and remember to wear black tomorrow. Good night.

P.S. Don't you even dare to think about hacking my account, hired BN hackers. In case you didn't know, I'm acquaintance with the person who caused panic in 2000.

POLITICS! (not really)

It's me again! And today I'm going to touch on a sensitive subject now in my country (Malaysia) --- politics. The election's coming up, and everything here is in brouhaha. I practically can't go to the nearby convenience store without seeing a banner featuring a scale. Every time I flip through a newspaper, there's always an advertisement telling that the opposition party is terrible, making false promises, et cetera. Heck, they even got an advertisement on Youtube! Here's my opinion: If you're SOOOOO good and saintly and all the things that you claimed you are, why do you even need to attack the opposition party? If you have done good, the people of Malaysia would definitely know and hence vote for you! But ask your own conscience: have you done any good, if not any bad? When you die (as everybody must one day), do you dare to face your God and tell him you have not sinned during your ruling?

I have nothing against you personally, but from what I can see our country isn't getting any better, if not worse by the minute. We, the people of Malaysia, have seen enough! No advertisement or swaying talk is going to obscure our clear eyes! If you're still wasting wads of cash to put up advertisements, don't. Keep that money in case you need to run from the country or buy more jewelries.

P.S. If anyone's going to remove this forcibly, don't even try. All I wrote was hints, and as to how the readers perceive it is none of my cheese. So let's all wait for the grand change on 5th of May! Ini kalilah UBAH!

I CAN'T BREATH IN THAT CLOSET!!!!!!

It's been sooooo long since the last time I have updated my blog, but lately nothing special happened. I'm just doing what I do best: procrastination + vegetation. Not having a job, not studying, not even getting out of the house to get some fresh air. So here's why I'm updating my blog now. I have a BIG secret. No, scratch that. I have a ENORMOUS secret. I'm doing all I can to hide it from my parents, but I have told a few close friends (and a few not so close but still good friends). But as time went by, it kinda hurts to keep the secret to myself and a selected few (now not so few). So, for the first time since my realisation a few years back, I am going to post my secret. On the INTERNET. Drum roll please. BADUMDUMDUMDUMDUMDUM. I'm gay. There, I said it. (Man that closet was stuffy.) Even though my blog's is rarely visited, trust me, this makes me WAY better. If anyone reads this (I hope), take note that another blogger has come out of the closet on the internet. To you it might not be much to just come out on the internet, but to me it means a great deal. If you know anyone who's in the closet, tell them that a closet is no place for fabulous people like us, and he or she should come out and embrace their true selves.

P.S. I am trying my best to not extend my vegetation period any longer and do something productive. So this might mean more posts in the future. Yay me! :P